i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
just so you know, the uglier twin gives better bjs..don't be deceived
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
So much rum. So many feels.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Does Jesus have blonde highlights? Pretty sure I saw him in a lavender shirt and Sperry's.
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
I've been watching porn with my cat lately. No shame
Did you just email Kelly and I gay dinosaur erotica?
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
Omg. Tonight might be the night I masturbate thinking of a smoothie!
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