I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
He's fat, has man boobs, and is uncircumsized. I feel like I won the last woman on earth prize.
I just got cash back from buying a pregnancy test so that I can buy a case of joose. My life is in shambles.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Not even official and he's cleaned my puke twice. His hotdog skills are an added bonus. I've got a keeper
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
When the bouncer doesn't let you in... Don't ask him where he works so you could file a complaint with the better business bureau... It only proves him right.
It's 5 PM...and you're 35. Congrats on being an amazing human being.
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