Nothing gets me like the O.C. theme song does.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Is it penis luge time yet?
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Deciding whether to take my sex toys home for Christmas will be the biggest decision I make this holiday season
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
The house across the street caught on fire today, Drunk people high centered their car tonight. Looking out my front window I get to watch police chases all the time. I am going to miss this place.
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
He's the douchy one who wouldn't let me rip his shirt off, right?
my night went from a boring school play to hotboxing a car with 3 criminals
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