oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
So I answered the door in my underwear expecting my boyfriend. Instead I opened the door to Mormon missionaries. Do you think that was a sign from God?
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I took a cab from the club to the grocery store. I needed peanut butter.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
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