i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
my new ipod has external speakers and a video camera...all i can think about is how much more convenient it would be for me to make a pretty decent sex tape
I don't care what he thinks. My vagina has an open door policy.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I was orgasming and dying of laughter at the same time. I think I've found the One.
The ONLY place I sext is in my anatomy class. It's an amped up level of playing doctor.
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
She said it was unconventional for me to yell "Shazam!!" when I came inside her.
I’m traumatised. Bring vodka and condoms.
Sent. All. My. Texts. Like. This. Last. Night. Thank. You. Weed. Also. Had. A. Dream. About. A. Serial. Killer. That. Killed. Everyone. Except. Me. And.
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Randomize
