On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
This girl is drinking wine and watching grey's anatomy in the library during finals week. I hate comm majors.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
Vegas is great, yelled at a guy 4 lanes over if he wanted a bj. ended up having sex in a vacant lot. I think he was homeless.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I’ve got a sex swing and lube, he’s not going anywhere soon
Randomize
