i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
If you see my mugshot on the news tomorrow, its not what you think
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Today's hangover is probably top 3 of all time. Just threw up in an envelope. I'm on the ferry and didn't want to get out to puke over the side because I thought I might fall in the river.
I've been sleeping with the same person for about two months now, I think I know a little bit about stability and commitment.
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I'm killing it this week, I've peed my pants and put my vibrator into the washing machine.
He has to be employed and covid free. That’s my standard. I can’t be picky. 2020 has killed my sex life.
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