My 3rd grade teacher, who was also my fav, thought i was in prison. That seriously upsets me.
I dumped him because he's never seen star wars. I'm certain I did the right thing.
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I had no where to run... The dumpster sounded like a good idea at the time
Don't mean to be rude. But did you, by any chance, cut down a tree from my neighbors backyard last night? And did you also drag it to my yard and burn it?
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
I'm cuddling with a baby pig and drinking champagne right now.
The doctor that gave me my std test is trying to hook me up with her daughter lol
Update: that felon in Georgia I slept with is now a police officer. What a wonderful world
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
Randomize
