Kiss
Puke
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
you took him to the bathroom with you to pee and told him he had to hold your hand..but he couldn't turn on the lights because you didnt want him to hear you peeing..and still got laid. i wish i had your life.
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
How's your Sunday morning ritual of shitting and throwing up at the same time going?
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
BTW, Julia referred to you as a power bottom. Are you available?
This guy on tinder just told me that he wanted to tie me up and asked me what I thought. I told him I wanted tacos
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
Not sure what you smoked, but you put raw bacon on the lazy Susan and spent 45 minutes looking at it and mumbling Meat Spin
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