Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Well yesterday i made out with the entire football team and rifht at this very moment our waiter looks like a ken doll. Straight up. And he gave me wine so ill probly make out with him
college has opened so many doors for you
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
i dont even feel safe using a push mower...that hungover
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
Randomize
