i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
Do you remember snorting allspice and yelling at doughnut shop girl?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
my window is missing, there is half a pizza jammed into the disk slot of my PS3, and the entire kitchen floor is covered in cerial i cant see any wood floor. did we have fun?
Im quite confident that my struggle with sobriety ended last night sometime after dinner
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
Guess who's now on the no-fly list? If you guessed me, you'd be right.
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize