I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
well after this past weeked you can expect to see me on maury playing a little game called "who's the father"
He keeps asking me for girl advice, i told him im an expert at getting drunk, not girls
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
A horseman, i repeat, a man on a horse downtown just told me i was gorgeous and my friends were not. Not drunk enough.
WHY AM I THE ONLY ONE CONCERNED ABOUT THE SEAGULL IN THE OVEN
Get you some cowboy.
In that sentence you are the cowboy. That is not saying you should get a cowboy for yourself.
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I found out that rock climbing and alcohol does not go together. Ask my broken arm.
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
Randomize
