NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
I've slowly been stuffing french fries down his pants. I'm at 31 and he hasn't even noticed.
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
We should probably go now, otherwise the whores will descend.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
How many more times can I say I need to get laid before you kill me?
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Randomize
