If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
they say celebs die in threes. leave it to billy mays to throw in one extra COMPLETELY FREE!
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
Slip and slide hallway was not one of my better ideas.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Where am I? And why the fuck did you leave me here?
Relax. I left you somewhere safe plus you have all my weed so you know I will come back for you.
Randomize
