So does your leg always twitch violently when someone plays with your clitoris? Or has my ten years of piano playing finally paid off?
I havnt been this mad since the coche de Los murtos incident
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
A blow job from a tiger shark would still entail less risk to your genitals than having sex with her.
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Anal on new furniture sounds like a quickest way to violate a warranty
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize