PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
You can't be mad at me for wanting to drink though, it is the reason we're engaged
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
at first i said "no rollerblading if I'm going to be drunk," but we all know how that went
Once he bit me I drew the fucking line.
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
Randomize
