I just had a librarian tell me that "wikipedia is like sex"
When he expanded on the analogy it actually made sense. "you're going to do it either way, so I'm just going to tell you how to do it safely."
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
He told her, Don't talk. Just sit there so I can imagine that you have the kind of personality I wish you had.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
my cat just photo bombed my nudie.. does this qualify me as a cat lady?
As a 47 yo who just boned a 22 yo, it was definitely a walk of pride. She is a major feather in my aging cap.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Why did I wake up to a snap chat of myself drinking beer out of a blender?
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Like I just wanted some midlife crisis fun, not drama as big as his dick.
there is puke in my bra ... again
Randomize
