you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Just found two Xanax on the floor at the tanning bed. And yes, Im taking them...looks like going to get cancer is paying off
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I ran into his family and they made me a ham sandwich and I asked if they wanted to come streaking. I felt they deserved the invite.
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
