Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
she told me i should dip my dick in chocolate and then let her blow me since it was her 2 favorite things. weird or my new valentine for this year?
he said i was the most charming throwing up drunk person hes ever taken care of. so of course i had sex with him.
I think it was our ex-neighbor Mike. He leaves Taco Bell outside our door a lot
He'll drop off his extra tacos at our place bc he's super high when he orders & can't eat them all
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
What part of drinking with my mom makes you think i'd get naked
All of it
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I could be busy drinking my face off and getting red white and bruised per usual
I might be offended if you don't bang me tomorrow. You know, for America.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Everyday this week I have woken up to a different dick pic. It's like a dick pic a day calendar!
Randomize
