well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
you win again, gameday.
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I think my sister is getting tired of me breaking into her house so I can sleep with random girls when shes not there
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
If you ever insult pizza rolls again, I will dragon kick you in the throat
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
I just ordered a "football meatlong" from subway
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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