i just discovered a movie that charlize theron is a sex addict. i think my prayers have been answered
i realized our last day of finals is on cinco de mayo....it's god's way of saying drink ridiculous amounts of tequila and wear sombreros
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
he couldnt get it up, so i stole his lighter. i needed to have some reason to say the night wasnt wasted
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
Today's been pretty great, I went and bought the new Batman for the sole purpose of masturbating to Bane
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
he broke off the kiss to ask "can I grab your boob?" like props for asking for clear and concise consent but there HAS to be a sexier way to do it
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