What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
He was eating me out on the dryer...and his mom walked in with her laundry basket...
He wasn't the only one with a full load.
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
Amanda Bynes on the cover of maxim is my 8th grade masturbation fantasy come to life
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Can I color on your dick again?
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I had a spiritual reading tonight and my dead grandmother called me a whore.
Did you put Adderal in the fishtank in the lobby? The fish are acting like Olympic sprinters. Asshole.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
Randomize
