what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
She made me role-play everything from an older prof to a in-patient in need of a medical exam. Yay for cocaine.
Green mimosas i think yes
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
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