Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
As the guy I'm having sex with on the side I shouldn't ask you how to dump my boyfriend. But you are the most emotionally detached person I know.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
Randomize
