Food network will be on but we won't be watching
O by "watching" I mean "background noise"
Quick, to the slutcave!
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
That's the last time I fill my pockets with sushi.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Just got a call at work, I have to consent to a random drug and alcohol test by end of business day, if you arranged this it's the best/worst April fools prank ever.
its mom's weekend..did we need to couger proof the apt?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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