Pregnant stripper...not hot.
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I deserve to be covered in dicks
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
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