I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
the tow truck driver and i bonded while discussing our experiences with four lokos
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
I think it says something about my life when I start picking up girls while im in rehab. And I don't think it's good.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
All my female reproductive organs were screaming HELL YES last night.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Drunk purchased a negligee, plan b, keds and Himalayan salt shot glasses.. there’s only one reasonable purchase there, and we both know it’s not the sneakers
Randomize
