Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
if you're passed out when i get there i get to wear your banana costume and do awful things to you
These hangoverless Sunday mornings are becoming too regular.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
As for the other mouse...I don't have any mouse traps so I put a Jell-O shot on the ground. Party hard little dude.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
why does every cop we meet know your name?
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
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