Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
I swear, if he gets me a bowling ball for Christmas, I will throw it at him.
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I gargles a mimosa for breakfast. It's gonna be a killer Monday.
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
we have beer and we're watching the birds have sex in our yard.
Randomize
