Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
i had to call the bar to ask if they found my bowling ball. That good of a night
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
