Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
I'm shivering and sweating at the same time. Thanks a lot St. Patrick.
Can I use you as a job reference? Don't tell them i got you fired cause I banged you tho
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
We're both clumsy. What does this imply for our kids?
Helmets.
How much do souls cost? I feel like I need one if those.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
