she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
And the cops told us we were all naked.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
Freshman Move In Day, its like Christmas in August.
Dude, how the hell did you become an RA?
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
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