dude. i was so high. i watched shrek in russian.
I just finished washing your number off of my chest. I'm Bryan by the way.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
Is it hot in here? Is the room moving? Its moving. The room is moving. Its spinning like a top. Have you ever been covered in puke? What are you doing?
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
I had mdma, weed, and alcohol in my system. My doctor seems to think that's how I tore my groin.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
Randomize
