i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Circumcision scars are like fingerprints. I think I'm on to something man.
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Stop jerking off to vines my recommended list on YouTube is getting weird.
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Randomize
