I just cut my nipple shaving
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
can you buy anything in the cafeteria for less than $2? I spent the last of my laundry money on a chia pet
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Man, just talk to her friend and help me out. Otherwise we go home alone
I'd rather jerk off with a hand full of bumble bees then talk to her
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
I've been continuously high for the last 48 hours, and just broke my 4th vibrator. Coincidence? FIND ME A MAN I BEG OF YOU.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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