I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
And the cops told us we were all naked.
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
you inspire me to be a worse person
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
Just showered now I smell like berries instead of shame
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Good news, my sex bruises are fading. Bad news, my boobs look like I have a skin disease because of it.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
just woke up and had to check if i still had pants on, i really need to stop drinking
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize
