...is it true? will i see you next weekend
YES.
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
In chronological order you drank, sang, smoked, napped, threw up, cried, laughed, described your pubic area, passed out. You have abused the privilege to use me as your D.D.
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
Grandma is giving me marriage advice again. On the plus side, she thinks I'm straight now.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I just finished packing for spring break, took me 4 minutes. To be fair though I only put my trunks, a pair of underwear, and 50 condoms in my bag.
My dad found my bra hanging from my rear view mirror. Happy long weekend.
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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