I wanna bring you to show and tell
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Why isn't there a sort by hair color option on Facebook? It would make stalking much easier.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
How is it that I, the only one that didn't drink last night, was the only one puking out the car window?
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
Randomize
