So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
Oh we're fine. I made her a "sorry I peed on you" omelet.
Oh and I guess I added our cab driver on Facebook. He has "liked" every single one of my beach pictures. Kill me now.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
My hot gay tattoo artist grew a beard and I'm not taking it well.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
His idea of a night out is drinking beer in the driveway. He's been on house arrest too long
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
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