no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
He keeps whispering to me that he can't wait to tie my hands up with my wig?
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I think I left my chapstick at your house when I tried using your penis as a catapult and flung it on the floor. Be a dear, and try to see if you can find it.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
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