Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
I didn't know there was such thing as a bad orgasm. Until him.
She's gonna be fat in the future. On a side note I had a "It's not you, it's me." conversation with a bottle of jack last night.
Struggs. It's also 90 degrees out but I'm not sure I can feel heat or cold any more. Too hungover.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
Sun* burn. But that sounds like wait.. Midsentence thought... It would be like swimming in a giant bowl of cereal.. Only I would be cereal. This is brilliant.
Boys that pee in my bed don't get happy birthday wallposts on facebook
Everyone says I win the strip club
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
starting to feel like a fuck wizard with a magical sixth sense for people fucking.
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Randomize
