In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
Someones car got stolen, everyone is yelling, and im drunk just sayin yeah buddy over and over again
Not a single person will look me in the eye. Last night must've been bad.
I was just "that girl you seen blowing some dude outside when you drove by"
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
dude, last night I won a real sword and a bottle of vodka in a cards against humanity tournament
WE'RE MOVING TO IRELAND!!!! DON'T ASK QUESTIONS JUST BOOK THE DAMN FLIGHT!!!!
I am now "wine pairing" tums flavors with my strongbow, because apparently hard cider gives me heartburn.
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
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