Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Those drunk pictures you took of me? My mom is showing those to my grandparents.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
you ate an entire watermelon by using a CD as a spoon, then proceeded to chuck the leftovers at some dudes car...
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize