It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
when we asked you if you had had anything to drink tonight you looked up from the toilet while cupping the water into your hands and said "this.. just this"
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
SOMEONE has to puke in the potted plants at an Xmas party. As their boss I felt it should be me.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
There aren't enough words in the English language to fully describe how worried I am for your dick. And the rest of you, I suppose.
my roommates gone so i can take codeine and sleep naked
Randomize
