Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
Yes ma'am.Im also looking at my collection of penis pictures in my email playing "who;s penis is that"?
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
I have bite marks all over my ass. Is that an acceptable excuse for missing class?
ACTUALLY FUNNIEST MOMENT OF THE NIGHT WAS WHEN YOU WERE TALKING TO HIM AND YOU SAID "WHEN YOU MEET ME IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE A LOT ANGRIER." And then he said "WHEN I MEET YOU IN REAL LIFE I WILL BE LESS DRUNK, HOPEFULLY."
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
you said you heard a baby, so i told you to go feed it. you came back 2 hours later with a pizza and when i asked you where the baby went you pointed to the pizza and puked.
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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