Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
please don't fuck her on my bed i'm too poor for laundry quarters
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I keep picking up boring men who literally just want to cuddle. HOW AM I THIS BAD AT GETTING SEX?
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
So I crawled off the trampoline to puke in the neighbors yard. Wonderful house guest right here
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
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