Journey is playing on the radio....I think it is a sign I am going to pass my drug test
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
I just heard your voicemail. Glad you like my dick and think I'm cool
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
It wasn't as awesome as they lead everyone to believe. No stripper. Ran out of booze. The chipmunk. He was real.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
