based on who turned up here tonight the whole evening should just be called "mistakes i made when i was fat"
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You're like the Miss Manners of anonymous gay sex.
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
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