four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
Dude. She came to my room in nothing but a trench coat. Took it off and said, "you like" in her Costa Rican accent. God I love college.
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
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