This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
Random 1st period thought: do you think she could put "had a threesome" on her resume?
hey. who tried to drive me home last night?
not sure. we got lost. what do you mean "tried"?
i'm still in their car. parked on the beach. no one else is here. i have on different pants.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
definitely not taking the whole return culture shock so well...drinking a 100 proof rootbeer vodka float out of a german beer mass
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
She needs sedatives and a leash
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
You kidnapped her dog. I don't care that you and the dog are epic bros, that's just not cool. Return him.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
That's because I've spent the past 21 years convincing my parents the only emotions I have are sarcasm and bitterness.
you would not believe who i just fucked on my lunch break
I woke up to pee last night, got out of bed and proceeded to stand there because I had no idea where I was. Then, I heard my sexy as fuck personal trainers voice. Well-played blacked out me.
Randomize
