Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
This will never work out with him unless I somehow learn how to unhinge my jaw like a python.
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
No, that's just what we do when we hang out. We get drunk, have really awesome sex, then fight about why we never worked as a couple
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Well, I watched a girl proposition a shit ton of people, try to take a cocktail waitresses job and then proceed to walk into a wall. Damn, I'm a little jealous.
I was telling everyone at the frat that they had to try the "fantastic refreshment" that was everclear, vodka and country time
He said that I started crying after sex because he was leaving to go back to Europe after the semester was over and I wouldn't see his dick anymore. This is why I need to stop hooking up with the exchange students.
Wait. We seriously played strip beer pong at the bar last night. Who said I never came up with good ideas
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
Also, asking the guy who just told you he is crippled on edibles to watch your kid is probably frowned upon by most
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize
